Sunday 16th July 06, 6.39 pm

So this week I decided to actually do summat I've been thinking aboot for a while, and compile me top 100 albums, EVORRRR!"£

It actually didn't take as long as I thought, so I ended up doing the same for me favourite films. I'll post that list in a couple days, as I've never been one for overkill. Just ask me 12 ex-wives and 32 rape-victims.

The Buffet's Top 100 Albums

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Tuesday 11th July 06, 9.32 am

Superman Returns. Reviewed.

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Monday 3rd July 06, 10.34 am

Two weeks ago I wrote on this here site that I thought England would get to at least the Quarters. In truth, this wasn’t a prediction, more a big slice of hope mixed with a bit of praying.

- And they say the English aren't gorgeous.

You see, we’re used to our country flopping in the big tourneys, so when it happens its not so much a shock, more a bit more salt thrown into an already bubbling wound. We’re used to fucking up. We actually almost expect it. Yet we’ll be there, cheering along in the Euro 08 qualifiers and the resulting tournament (if we get through, FFS).

Why? Cos we love it, and despite the consistent anguish (and it was painful this time, eh boys n girls?), love England. So please don’t ever think we only “sing when we’re winning”, as it’s not true. I was singing “Three Lions” as I ripped my wall chart off the wall and flung it across the room yesterday. And I’ve pencilled in my next England shirt wearing for around summer next year.

Seriously though, well done boys, it’s been a ride, as ever. Work on the penalties though, eh? Cheersy.

Dannnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.

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Sunday 2nd July 06, 5.15 pm

Lily Allen - Alright, Still. Reviewed.

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Wendesday 14th June 06, 3.50 pm

United 93. Reviewed.

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Monday 5th June 06, 3.05 pm

Alreet!ӣ

Not updated this here fing in a while, so thought it was aboot time.

Not that the past month has seen amazing changes in my life or the world at large, but the thoughts there, eh?

There’s a few things I wanna mention/scribble aboot, so enough with the blabbering, FFS!

First off, I gotta say I cannot fucking wait for the World Cup. I say this every time out, but I’ve got this strong gut feeling that we’re gonna do alreet. At least to the quarters, anyway. Ok, it was “only” Jamaica on Saturday, but I think we played great and it’ll have filled the wee boys with a tasty bit of confidence before they head out for the real deal, so it achieved it’s objective, innit. I think we’re gonna look decent this time out, and I cannot wait for that first game on Saturday.

Me mate El Foamio has invited a few of us over to his for it, so that should be a cracking laff too. If you’re going I shall see you there. I’ll be the one in the celebratory thong.

This week I met my good mate Pete’s new girlfriend Jo for the first time. A few of us headed to the boozer to welcome her into our foul fold, and I’m glad to say I really liked her. Like me, Pete’s never really had the greatest of luck on that front and has found it a mission to meet someone who he really likes, so it was great to see him finally have that in his life. On first impressions I liked her a lot.

They also announced they’ve got engaged after a couple of weeks of knowing each other, which has to be the fastest engagement of recent times, but as long as he’s happy, we are. It sounds like madness indeedy, and believe me I was shocked to the arse when I first heard, but when you see them together it’s clear it’s genuine and real, and the smile on his face says it all to me.

All ze best to the both of you.

Still think the new Streets’ record is a bit rubbish, so haven’t really bothered with it recently. Fucking shame, Nige.

I am however getting into young Lily Allen, daughter of Keith (sadly), who’s just about to release her debut album. It’s really catchy pop musak with geezer-girl lyrics and I recommend it to all. Might have to do a proper review soon, as it deserves it. If she’s not even half successful, I’ll eat my own feet. And your Mum’s. In a baguette. Twice.

Random things that have made me cackle this week:

Me mate Wayne offering up “Zza Zza Ga-paw” as an alternative to “Parm-ala Hand-erson”, as the lonely man’s shag-buddy. Inspired.

Sezer The Gimp’s face as his name was called out by El Pointy Conk in the Big Bruvva eviction. Again, Wayne summed up this year's show perfectly. "It's good, but they're all cunts, innit".

Keith Chegwin being blatantedly on the cider on Big Bruvva’s Little Bruvva. What a silly little cheeky he is, eh kiddas?

And last, but least, the sight of a fat man (not me) pegging it for the bus, only to run into an advertising hoarding and half-exploding to the concrete below.

You shouldn’t laff, but let’s anyway.

I always end with this, but I mean it this time. I’m gonna make a strident effort to sit and update this here fing more often as I actually enjoy me ‘ol self, even if I’m currently typing with one mitt as I really need a plop, and the other’s holding in the goodness.

In the next posting I'll go more in-depth on this, but i'm currently big on the idea of doing a weekly or monthly Buffet Radio Show or Podcast, featuring general gabble and guests an that. Could be a bit of a laff anyway, and it saves typin', dun' it!"£

Up ze England boyz, and check y’all soonish. Or never again. Depends if I come home alive, innit.

Dannnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.

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